Here we go...

Well, it's official.  We have entered a new phase in this household.  We have a Toddler who has learned to Act Out.

I have a good friend who just had a baby, days ago.  I read as she regaled her birth story, entering the ranks of motherhood.  Her badge is in place, earned by her physical pain to bring a human being out of the womb and on to this planet.  It took me back to over a year ago, when my own badge was earned as a mother.  But what you learn over time is that although you earn your "mother" wings early on, you don't really become a parent until you have as I said, a toddler officially acting out.

The scene of the crime was my parent's house, last Sunday, during a lovely dinner prepared by my mother, sister and I. The table linens were out, the gifts were lined up for Father's Day, and we were enjoying the delicious spread.  Well, actually, I was half-shoveling bites of food into my mouth as I tried to also shovel food onto and/or around and in the vicinity of Lauren's high chair. But I was not feeding her fast enough. I was like a circus bear, not pleasing the ring master. And who was the master? Lauren, Queen of the Punkies. Grunting, pointing and general disarray quickly led to her throwing food, pulling it out of her mouth and her being dismissed from the table. The dismissal was not before I uttered some very parental words: "If you can't appreciate this food that we took time to prepare, then you are done! You are going to get down...and...play!" She retreated with pleasure, quickly grabbing her toys and making sure that I knew she was MORE than happy to play, away from her mother.  Oh God, it's happening. Next thing you know I'll be saying, "There are starving children in China and you WILL finish your dinner!" 

What happened next was maybe the single most terrifying and hysterical event of Lauren's childhood, to me. She crawled up into Grandpa's lap, one chair over from me.  She looked sideways at me, and babbled in her baby voice, "Diedle diedle diedle!!!" And she SHOOK HER FINGER AT ME. OMG. Oh no, she DIDN'T.

Here we go, I suppose. It's on. Good bye, wonderful one.  Hello, terrible two's.

Let the parenting begin.

♥ V :)

Another week is upon us...

"To follow your life's guidance, you may have to reassign some seemingly important things to 'unimportant.' If you believe that pleasing your horrible boss or having a spotless house is a higher priority than playing with your children or sleeping off the flu, be prepared for a long and strenuous battle against destiny.  Also, be prepared to lose."

~Martha Beck, life coach

♥ V :)

Keepin it real: Fabulosity!

There has been some major fabulosity going on at my house. MAJOR. Because you know why? My mother is out for summer break from teaching. The first Friday she was off, she swooped in like the magical fairy godmother, whipping this place into shape. I mean, seriously fabulous things are going on here.  This has been going on for two weeks. I haven't even been able to blog much because I'm enjoying having all of this fabulous time to do fabulous things.  Because not only has my mom been watching Lauren, she takes her home for days on end to do fun grandmotherly type things with my dad. And that's why I titled this blog "Keepin it Real." Yes, I love being a mother and doing motherly things. But when summer break comes, I lay my apron down (yeah right) and I have time to do things that I enjoy. Things that I used to do. Happy mommy, happy baby, this is what I say. :)

But back to my mother.  You have to understand that my mother is Martha Stewart.  I come home from work and she says things like, "Oooh, I hope I didn't trim those bushes too short. Do you like them??" Ummm, seeing as how I don't own a bush trimming apparatus and I have never really even glanced at said bushes, yes, they are probably fine. She does things like, clean out under my sink. Clean my oven. Clean out the fridge. Organize my dish towels, by holiday. All while watching a one year old. She told Ian last night, "Lauren and I took a two hour walk today." We laughed hysterically. TWO HOURS? Dear God! How does she do it all?? Who takes two hour walks? We told her she needed to sit down and watch the View, but that really isn't her style.

Now back to me. Back to the Fabulosity that has been going on over the last two weeks. Like I said, I've laid my apron down for the time being. I've done things like, watch a movie on a week night, in an actual theatre.  Then I went out for drinks afterwards with Chaffee, and stayed out til midnight. Midnight! On a work night! Then Ian and I had a fabulous day together last Saturday. Just out all day together, starting with breakfast, until 1 in the morning. We wined and dined ourselves into oblivion. Last night I spent an hour browsing at Target. My mom called me because they took Lauren to my home town fair to see the animals. She said, "Lauren touched a horse's nose! And she heard a pig snort, and she saw a lama." I'm glad my sissy is having fun, and so am I.

I love that Lauren is spending time with her grandparents. And I love this free time. But I do miss my baby. I guess I just can't wait until my little lama is home with her mama.

♥ V :)

Heavy hearts

I have been reminded several times in the past few days of how short life can be, by an unfortunate amount of deaths that have recently occurred. Strange, bizarre situations. All of them different, but all resulting in the same end: loved ones left behind, mourning. It almost feels like the law of attraction, working at its worst - you hear of one bad thing, and suddenly there is another, before you can even process the first bad thing.

I didn't know most of these people directly, but the bizareness of the situations have made people stop, talk about them, and wonder about how the families are surviving. I put myself in their shoes. I think about the ones left behind. I feel sadness, and I have questions, and my heart is heavy with the unfortunateness of each individual scenario.

I have always felt that the other side is really quite close to us, that if we just listen and feel, we are closer than we can imagine to that other stratosphere. I imagine that there is a thin veil seperating us from the other side of this life. I believe everything happens for a reason. I don't believe in coincidence. And I believe that the ones we have loved and lost are so, so close to us.

I have had too many instances in my life than to think any other way. My grandmother died when I was 12 years old. It was the single most horrible event of my life, even 18 years later. But I believe 100% and I have no doubt, that I connected with her and my grandfather through the help of a psychic. Once you have experienced what I have experienced, there is no going back. You know. They are there, right beside us, guiding us and helping us.

In these difficult times, I pray for peace for those that are hurting. I pray that whatever they believe in as being true and right and pure in this world, they can connect with it and use it to be strong and also come to terms with what has happened.

"There is a right time for everything:

A time to be born;
A time to die;
A time to plant;
A time to harvest;
A time to kill;
A time to heal;
A time to destroy;
A time to rebuild;
A time to cry;
A time to laugh;
A time to grieve;
A time to dance."

Ecclesiastes 3:1-4

~V

65th Anniversary

I sit here tonight, with colored index cards littered around me, in preparation for the toast I am giving tomorrow at my Grandparent's 65th surprise Anniversary party. I was honored when weeks ago, my mom asked me to write a special poem and toast to read in their honor. I enjoy these kinds of things. I wrote a poem to go along with my speech for my sister's wedding toast when I was her maid of honor.  I love writing, and I love when writing something special can make someone feel honored on an important day in their life.

So my mother and I have been emailing back and forth to each other all of those, "Remember when..." type of things you remember from growing up, so I can use them in my speech. It is funny to think of my mother having a childhood, before she was my mother. It is funny to think of my grandparents as being parents, before they were my grandma and grandpa.  It is even weirder to think of myself as a parent, and not only as a child and a grandchild, and that now I have added another generation to this every growing chain of four generations in my family.

In life, we seem only to be given many good things, but maybe not all of them. I was lucky enough to be given a wonderful family.  My grandparents got married on June 6, 1945.  The family started with two people, on that day. Two farm kids that lived through the depression, who got married when my Grandpa was on leave from the Navy.  Back when a man was a man, and worked with his hands and a woman was a woman, who's role was to work in the home, and raise the children.

So much has changed since that time.  Ian and I live together, but we aren't married. For the last two years, up until recently, my job has supported us while I go to work in corporate America. There were months at a time when Ian would stay home with the kids, watching Lauren all day and helping Audrey with her homework when she got off of the bus.  He still does all of the cooking, and always will.  It makes me wonder, what else will have chaged by the time my Lauren decides to get married? How will it be for her?

For as much as times have changed, I realized by writing this speech what has stayed the same: no matter how it gets done, people want the best for their kids. They want them to have a happy childhood, to have trips to remember and traditions that they upheld. My mom has so many fond memories of her childhood. Trips to Niagara Falls, Chicago, camping, learning to ice skate, riding ponies.  I realize that Ian and I are doing the exact same things that my grandparents did: trying to give our kids the best childhood that we can, through trips to Disney World and Kentucky Lake and mini-adventures of ice skating and whatever else we dream up and can afford at the same time.

All I know is that I am thankful that God gave me a partner to go through this life with: a good man that wants the best for his kids. I had to look a little further than my grandparents did. They went to the same school growing up. Let's just say I had to kiss a few more frogs to find my prince than grandma did. But I found him. That's all that matters. If we have half the marriage that my grandparents have had, we will have been more than lucky.

♥ V :)

Holiday

The stars aligned on this holiday weekend.  We have no children under our roof...atleast until Sunday. 

With our own child, and with Ian's children, schedules must be orchestrated weeks in advance.  There is always something that comes up. A change. But on this weekend, his girls are swimming happily at Lake Kentucky with nana and papa, and my parents' wish was fulfilled to have their only little granddaughter for a couple of nights. I know that at grandma and grandpa's she is treated like a petite princess. Let's just say I don't worry about her at all, and that every need and wish her little toddler heart has is met and fulfilled.

Which brings me back to the fact, that we have no kids, on this holiday weekend, for the moment.

First order of business on the few times a year that we have no children, is without a doubt, SLEEP. I find myself teetering on the edge of exhaustion daily. I use cheap tricks to get through the day...coffee, metabolism boosting energy pills, working out for that rush of endorphins. Anything to get through the day. Which is why I promptly came home Friday night, and fell asleep for atleast 3 hours.  I used to take these naps, BC (before children), to prepare for a night out and a weekend with a fully planned social schedule. Now? The sleep, is enough. Even with my nap, I don't wake up until 11am the next day. It felt strange, and I woke in a trance, from strange dreams and heavy from sleep.

I realize that with children in the house, I am perpetually on the treadmill, of our little life. There is always something to do, to fix, to clean, to prepare, to plan for.  I've realized that if I didn't have these little people to care for, I would get very little done. However, it feels nice to stop; pause; and for atleast a day or two, get a break from it all.  Share some time with Ian. With my thoughts. Linger in my dreams in a long night's sleep, and ignore it all.

Thank God above for grandparents, holidays and rest. We are very blessed. ♥ V :)

American Honey

After this GD heat died down today, I took a jog around my neighborhood. The cool air was refreshing. The moon was up in the sky. Ducks were in the ponds.  A game of pick up basketball was going on down at our park. Reminded me of all the summers I spent at the park growing up...playing basketball, tennis, and swimming endless hours at the pool. God those were good times. If I could go back to just one of those starry summer nights, and be that kid again. I love this song by Lady Antebellum. Always reminds me of those old days so much...

She grew up on a side of the road
Where the church bells ring and strong love grows
She grew up good
She grew up slow
Like American honey


Steady as a preacher
Free as a weed
Couldn't wait to get goin'
But wasn't quite ready to leave
So innocent, pure and sweet
American honey


There's a wild, wild whisper
Blowing in the wind
Calling out my name like a long lost friend
Oh I miss those days as the years go by
Oh nothing's sweeter than summer time
And American honey


Get caught in the race
Of this crazy life
Trying to be everything can make you lose your mind
I just wanna go back in time
To American honey, yea


There's a wild, wild whisper
Blowing in the wind
Calling out my name like a long lost friend
Oh I miss those days as the years go by
Oh nothing's sweeter than summer time
And American honey


Gone for so long now
I gotta get back to her somehow
To American honey

♥ V :)